All Sorts of Musings and Meanderings

Pretty much the quickest to piss me off is to try to tell me to do something or in the case of the guy at the gym yesterday to tell me that because he doesn't get sick in more adverse conditions that I can't get sick. I think he figured out he pissed me off because he didn't say anything else after that. This was all in response to me not going to the gym on Friday when I was home sleeping feeling like shit. What is it with people who don't get sick. Yes, I'm happy for you, but unfortunately, I do not have the ability to ward off germs like you. I'm very sorry if that annoys you, but guess what, it fucking annoys me worse! Does anybody really think that I wanted to feel like shit on MY BIRTHDAY??

Okay, I'm over that now.

I finally watched Sideways last night. It was an enjoyable movie, for the most part. As long as I didn't think about the loser Jack intent on cheating on his very soon to be wife. I'm sorry but I have cheating issues. Yes, I know it's a movie, but there are guys out there who think it's okay to sleep around before they get married in a week, because they won't be able to afterwards. Uh, sorry. If you're willing to do it a week before the wedding, why do I think you won't do it after the wedding? The wine stuff was way over my head. I either like a wine or I don't. I'm not overanalysing it, basically, because I do not have a "sharp palate." I certainly can't tell if a wine is "oaky" or whatever. It's wine, you drink it. Sorry, Jason. ;-) And can somebody please explain the title to me? Why Sideways?

Pat Robertson is a good Christian or not. WTF? Calling for the assassination of another country's president? I'm pretty sure there is not a God in existence, even Robertson's, who would approve of this. Here is the final paragraph of the article reminding readers of previous idiocy that has come from this "Christian" man:

Robertson has made controversial statements in the past. In October 2003, he suggested that the State Department be blown up with a nuclear device. He has also said that feminism encourages women to "kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians."

Clarity shared with her readers memories of her father (who is in Iraq) cutting the grass while she would stand inside and watch and then get him a glass of ice water when he'd finish. My father (Former Father) pawned the grass cutting chore off on to his kids as early as possible. First my older brother, then my older sister and then me. I would say I was cutting the grass by the fourth grade. Someone would cut the front and then somebody else would cut the back. I honestly don't ever remember my father cutting the grass. I remember him fertilizing the lawn with a SCOTT machine (we saw one for sale at a garage sale over the weekend). I remember my Mom cutting the grass and her white Keds being all green from it when I was in college and was never home to cut the grass because I was always working or studying. I remember that in the winter when the walks needed to be shoveled that we kids would do it or again later on my Mom doing it. I would say that my father had kids so that he wouldn't have to do the shitty jobs around the house. To this day you won't catch me gardening as I HATE weeding. I live in an apartment so that I don't have to cut the damn grass, edge the lawn along the sidewalk, plant flowers or a garden, etc. It is just not my idea of fun. I know I complain about FF a lot and you're probably thinking, Geez, Kathleen, do you have any good memories of him?

That's a really good question. Let me think. Um, no, I can't think of any offhand, but I'll try to come up with some. YS did point out the other day that it was thanks to FF that we all have very eclectic tastes in music, including classical. Of course, I can't thank him for my love of punk or rock music as he hated them. One summer, my parents and YS and LB were away in California on vacation. I was home because I was in college and had to work in order to pay for college. While they were gone, I was BLASTING my Billy Idol albums on FF's really nice stereo system (we were allowed – don't stress – maybe not the BLASTING part, but we were allowed to use it) whenever I was home. And since it was summertime and this was before the prevalent use of central air windows and doors were open. One day I was outside hanging clothes on the line (the dryer never worked properly and got too hot so all clothes had to be hung) and Mr. L next door was in the backyard and greeted me. "Hey Kathleen. Your parents are away on vacation?" "Oh yes, they're in California." "I had a feeling with the fine music that's been coming from your house this week." I was mortified, and said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'll turn it down." "No, no need to do that. You kids don't get to break out enough. You enjoy your music while you can." I mean, even the neighbors knew what a jackass FF was. And besides I wasn't playing late into the night, it was usually during the day/evening.

Okay, I remembered one. I apparently was more in need of FF's approval than the rest of my siblings because I bit the classical music bug pretty hard – not to the exclusion of all else – but I had a thing for Beethoven's 9th Symphony. And one year the DSO was playing it and FF actually got tickets and took Mom and me. I don't think he did that for the other kids, but he might have. Of course, back then the DSO played at Ford Auditorium which was a POS acoustically, but I certainly didn't know that at the time and was just over the moon that FF was doing something just for me which is not something that happens very often when you're one of five children.

When we were kids he would play softball every Tuesday night in the summertime. This meant that we got a kids' meal earlier than usual dinner (and by kids' meal, I don't mean fast food, I mean waffles and sausage or hot dogs and Chef Boyardee – shit my father would NOT eat), and then sometimes Mom would take us all down to Hines Park where FF would play softball in his employer's league. We loved it because we could run around and play on swings, etc. with the other kids. I did enjoy FF's softball league.

I just read this story which reminded me of my own athletic team tryouts in grade school and high school. I got cut from every team for which I tried out. I am just not athletic, but FF was a high school football star, sports were important to him, so I tried out because I thought it was one way to get his approval. And it does not help when OB and OS actually make teams. I felt like the biggest loser when I didn't make the girls softball team in grade school. I tried so hard I remember chasing a ball on the school parking lot (I think the diamond was either being used by the boys or it was rained out) and completely wiping out on the gravel and crap at the end where nobody ever went. I was a mess from that wipeout. OS, of course, made the team. I didn't bother trying out the next year as who needs that pain and embarrassment twice in a lifetime. But then in high school, we got a girls soccer team. I figured this was something I could do. The coach had his preferred girls already picked out though, and he only ONCE came to where I was doing practice drills and of course, I was so nervous I messed up. That was it. He cut only two people – and once again OS made the team while I proved once again that I'm sadly lacking in athletic abilities. And like the "most kids" in the news story, I didn't go back the following year to try again.

My sister has (or had) a cheerleading trophy, a softball trophy and probably a bowling trophy. My only sporting trophy was for my intramural girls soccer team which won the school championship one year…and of course, the team invited OS to be on the team after her team had gotten eliminated (this was allowed), so she got the damn plaque too.

It's a really good thing that I don't allow my self-esteem to be sucked down the drain by my complete suckiness at sports. And I stopped caring years ago about getting FF to like me or approve of me. It's a lost cause and I know that it is his problem and not mine.

So, how's that for a completely convoluted fucked up entry? Have a jimdandy Tuesday!